So the last day on the vacation I woke up in the bath tub. My mom said she asked me during the night what I was doing and I said, "swimming."
i saw her thong sticking out from across the bar...that was my cue
I just woke up to me licking the dognuts
You mean Doughnuts?
......No :(
Omg I'm so stupid. All the peoples fb status that said "spain" I thought they were all going to spain.......
Sometimes I think I have so much sex with you to be sure you're actually straight.
most desperate stoner moment might have been when we filled the bong up with pond water
desperate times, desperate measures
Worrying about "What smells like cat pee?" is so much easier than worrying about "What am I doing with my life?"
It's not that I even wanna fuck these guys anymore, just cuddle that's all. My conscience has never been so proud.
Hey where the fuck is the rest of my beer? Lets start this day off right
in honor of breaking bad starting soon, i am now banging a walter white lookalike. viva heisenberg!
This hangover is what we deserve after that level of debauchery.
I have need of you to return home with haste, as I require the magical capsules you possess to relieve the posterior pain I am living. I battle this demon with stubborn grit, however I feel that defeat is on the horizon.
Ick. That's not even the fun kind of punishment.
I wish I was there so i could bitch slap his incredibly sexy face
Interlocking vagina powers go!!'
Oh god, your drunk again aren't you?
Randomize
