matts gf stood and watched my naked ass gather my clothes off his floor this morning. sweet.
Am I the only person who thinks Megan Fox looks totally like a Thai lady boy with a serious tanning bed fix?
I'm thinking of having one or both of my boobs out. They're small but they're mighty.
Ketchup is God's man juice
Just did free shots of tequila at a walmart. Hello Mexico
My walk of shame got a new perspective when I walked into his livingroom and found his roommate fucking some chick on the coffee table.
I full on slapped a girl with pizza. Like in the face with sauce splattered everywhere and grease with a hard slap to the face.
the last guy with this job had a bookshelf fall on him. He's in the Er. Im high and they gave me his shift. How do you think i feel?
My birthday is in 11 days. Going ham. Consciousness will not be an option
when you're a senior and the freshman guy you wake up next to asks who you are, you DO NOT give him your real name.
multiple people will be seeing my nips tonight. not mad about it at all
We had an in depth conversion about the best way to take a dick pic. Both with and without mirrors.
This time tomorrow I will be drunk and in a voodoo shop
That was the most spiritually awakened shit I have ever taken.
Looks like the opera singer hook up is paying off. Ran into the MILF from 407 and she said “your lady friend sounded like a very lucky girl.”
Randomize
