i'm transferring to degrassi. i don't care that it's severely canadian. classes are five minutes long, there's no actual work and you can get oot of class whenever you want to go have a dramatic scene with someone in the hall
She wants out first dance to be to 98 degrees i do cherish you...remember how i said we didn't need open bar....
just took a shot of real whiskey... i forgot what it's like to drink liquor that costs more than twelve dollars.
The trip involved octopus tentacles coming from the little holes in my TV's speakers. The beauty of the nonexistant symbolism had me in tears.
i tried to climb in the window in the limo because i wanted the driver to take me to get noodles. ive reached a new level of fat kid
Hey, hey, hey, hey. This is a hurriCAN.
I cannot believe he got soft mid fuck. I just hope he bought that horrible impression you did of my dad. I love you though, you came in clutch tonight.
It was the least I could do after throwing up in your purse.
It was awful. Their identical twins so it was like having sex with Jeff wearing a wig and shaved legs.
I woke up on top of his counter next to a pot of boiling water and an empty package of ramen... what happened to the ramen, we will never know.
That bottle of wine took a part of my soul with it.
you literally stared at me for three minutes and then said "hey this tequila isn't gonna drink itself, boss"
I'm in a corner eating carrots and drinking champagne. I've hit a new kind of low.
How is that low? I love carrots.
Would it be creepy if I masturbated with my face in the pillow he slept on last night? Cuz I'm pretty sure that's about to happen
Grandma cant send me 4 lbs of gummi bears and expect me not to soak them in some sort of alcohol
So how do I tell him I've been sleeping with his wife too?
Randomize
