brad dismisses pussy with prejudice
Bleh. If he hadn't ascended into heaven and sat at the right hand of the father, Jesus would be rolling over in his grave right now.
Soooo billy mays was on coke. I'm about as shocked as I was when Clay Aiken came out
if it walks like a guido and talks like a guido, i'm gonna fuck it.
After throwing up, the toothpaste tasted so good. Thank you for not letting me eat it.
There is nacho cheese and blood everywhere.
I only get commercials for vodka and Rogaine now. You're exactly right, Hulu. That's exactly right.
you cant ever make fun of my bong's stick on moustache again. its the reason the cop let me keep it and my weed.
you know what would be perfect? if you flew in on a horse/cat holding taco bell and then you swooped me up and took me to disney world and it was magical
Please. I don't care how shitty his fake life story was. As horny as I was I just wanted the prettiest man possible in case I accidentally got pregnant. He had blue eyes.
That birthday blow job you ordered came in the mail today. I suggest you hurry home.
She sneezed like 10 times, put her head down on the table and then laid down on their couch and fell asleep. In the middle of the dominoes game. I'll never understand why my dad continues to provide my mom wine.
Dude I woke up with a handprint shaped bruise on my ass, a pong ball in my cleavage, and somebody else's gold chain around my neck. Who's house am I in?
My boyfriend and my fuck buddy are going to the strip club together... Should I be concerned?
tell raye i said hi and sorry for bleeding on the limes
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