Moved my bed either I'm a whore or every guy I have ever slept with hid condom wrappers under my bed
i don't mind that he's uncut. i like it! it's like a little sweater!
a cock doensn't need a sweater! especially a skin sweater! wtf.
That's like some buffalo bill hannibal lector shit.
Omg just woke up. 6am. random apartment. broad daylight. bunch of ppl doin coke around me. Theres a bridge nearby. I think my dentist is down the block. Oof.
She's echoing.. Her head must be in the toilet..
Have you ever realized how cool bread is? Like so many things taste good on it. Like its crazy to think that peanut butter and turkey can both taste good on the same thing.
I find it fascinating that she'd be more comfortable with her mom finding out she submits dirty disney confessions on tumblr than about her secret email account she uses to chat with dutch and brazilian strangers.
we told the drug dealer that our car was dead and we needed a jump so he would bring the drugs to us...
You made me drive your car so you could give the dude from the parking lot a BJ in the back seat. Classy.
Just sucked some sandy dick on a boardwalk & now I'm at a family reunion hbu
Does Jesus have blonde highlights? Pretty sure I saw him in a lavender shirt and Sperry's.
the conference was great. we had to hide the acid in a planter in front of the department of agriculture though
Apparently she hired a private investigator when he took out a restraining order on her. So the answer is no, I didn't hit it.
Bank just called....we left my debit card in the ATM last night.
it's like he didn't even know what a vagina was
I just turned down an invite to sit on a face. IDK who I am.
What? Are you sick?
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