I'm totally gay for Miss Californiaaaaaa
oh sweet, sweet irony
It was the single greastest thing to happen to my dick ever
She fell onto my light and broke all four plants. I don't care how good the blowjob was.
my bedside table was not meant to hold this many beer bottles.
The plan is to make enough mistakes this weekend to hold me over until spring break
ALTON JUST DID GRAVY SHOTS. THIS IS WHY HE'S MY HERO
What can I say, your life is charmed. I'm on the couch trying to decide whether or not to puke again.
Lmao the neighbor heard yall last night She wanted me to tell you way to finish strong
On the one year anniversary of me loosing my virginity... thousands of people will be taking their pants of on subways all around the world
It's like a tribute to you being a slut
How does one chug a beer and swing the bottle at someone in a single motion? This guys a beer ninja man
Woke up, moved an empty handle of fireball to spit blood, then put the morning cigarette out in it.
Well I'm sorry I assumed you were a human and that humans have the capability to forget sometimes.
She's just a lonely cunt and i hope she stays that way for the rest of her fucking life.
This seems like an over reaction to someone eating your fries.
grapes are the best munchies food ever cuz like the juice explodes in my mouth and my mouth gets all relieved of dryness. and the skin of the grape is like the food. and theres so many grapes!
He talked me out going to the bar. No one ever talks me out going to the bar..this is fucking love.
Randomize
