Totally using formspring as an incognito way of making sure that girl from last night wasn't jailbait.
i'm about to tell me dad "sorry staying in isnt an option. i'm fucking a marine tonight."
Relationships are fuckin' work. And you can't just up and leave with no questions when you really just need to get home because you're about to shit your pants.
You're so wise.
I gather from Facebook you got drunk last night and took semi naked pictures of yourself?
I think I'm leaving the streamers and balloons up from 4th of july till after he stops by. It'll be like the universe is celebrating his massive dick.
It wasn't a mystery that it was the pizza cooking in the oven when we stumbled out of the bedroom in a smoke filled apartment at 2am. We are dangerous drunks
Sockward: that moment during sexytimes when you realize your socks are still on and you have no idea how to remove them in a non-awkward fashion.
How bad would it be to ask my maintenance man for new blinds because the dude puked on those too?
I achieved the level of drunk I wanted even with the length of dress I was in..
tried to suck my ex boyfriends dick last night at a bar... Happy homecoming from me to you
I need to reevaluate my stance on weekday hangovers...
Well, after a pitcher of beer, I set my ex on fire. It was a little fire, he's fine. How's your night?
If we had a dog do you think we would be less hoe-y?
Nah
are you drinking tonight?
I have an exam tomorrow
so yes.
I prefer to think of hangovers as extreme sobriety, which can only be cured by more booze
Randomize
