You can spell. I can kill people with no remorse. We all have our skills.
So I just went home and made my own spanx by cutting the legs off of a pair of nylons. I'm either a genius or missed my calling to live in a trailer park.
I just saw a girl walking up the hill with a little red wagon full of booze... I want to be in her study group.
I decided to follow my clitoris instead of my heart.
Fucking him was like shopping for my first training bra.. Embarrassing yet extremely useful
There's a stripper banging on the door demanding to see you.
She said " I'm going to get her back one day soon for putting extacy in my pop while I drove her to whislter" just a heads up.
I need a therapist, but moreover we are going to be really drunk.
I'm gonna take off my shirt and spin it around my head like petey Pablo so u can find us�
Well he can play the xylophone with his erect cock... So he's got that going for him
I am stoned at Disneyland with my little brother. It's gonna be a good day.
You answered, dry heaved into the phone twice, & then hung up on me.
The struggles of a small town man whore
Even though I'm gonna be a felon I'm having fun for time being.
i ate pretzels. i might be the first human to be hospitalized from pretzels. that's how bad this is.
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