i guess that's what happens when you find your girlfriend at the zoo
I know I'm all grown up when I don't have to take my pregnancy test in the store bathroom anymore.
Well unless he sent his sperm via fedex, this baby isnt his
You know you had good weekend wheb we you hook up with three different girls and you don't feel no pain when u pee in the morning
we found him in the shower with a bottle of jose saying "this is Mexico's fault"
He took out the lube and started calling it fuck fluid
dude uncooked spaghetti noodles dipped in thousand island dressing is better than it sounds
Wash that dress asap. You laid down on the kitchen floor and tried to sweep the floor with your body.
hey, this is the ginger girl from the party...i've thought about it and I wanna join the american girl drinking team
Might as well permanently tattoo lush somewhere on my body and show it to people when I decide to drink so they won't serve me.
she broke up with me the week she got divorced. maybe I should grab a beer with her ex
He balanced a treat on his nose, and then he rolled me a joint. My bf is the best pet ever.
Just don't let me get too drunk. At one point I pulled out my dick and pissed at that party. Like on the wall.
Stop it. You know what r&b does to my body
All my friends are getting into relationships and going through breakups and I'm having Plan Bs and crunch wraps for dinner.
Randomize
