I thought you said his peep was too small
it is but i have no money and nothing is on tv until 7 when americas next top model comes on.
so then you were screaming "GIVE ME KELVINS!" and heating things up in the microwave and no one knew what you wanted
My dad is complaining about how his computer keeps getting viruses. I don't have the heart to tell him he needs to stop downloading so much porn.
we've been at disney 20 seconds and she already got the cops called over
ya, but you'll graduate college with a higher education. I'm looking at at least two addictions, an abortion, and a few weeks jail time.
He tried to write down the address for the cab on half a bagel.
when he was about to finish he told me to avert my eyes and keep my lady parts away. chivalry isnt dead.
at that time a 4 pound meatball stuffed with pizza rolls seemed more important than bailing you out of jail.... sorry.
I wore water proof eyeliner just incase the first picture of me of 2012 is a mugshot
I flossed his teeth and then we had sex in the bathroom. It just seemed like a good idea.
when he pulled his cock out I told him he'd brought a knife to a sword fight
Please collect your boy friend. He semi-passed out on the couch and trying to grab bums as people walk by. Anyone's bum, he's not choosy.
Safe to say I'm terrified but totally AMPED
Dude if i sent you a picture of the inside of my fridge would you be able to break down and explain everything that was in it?
Dude I had sex with her and she STILL thinks I'm gay. I don't know what else to do.
Randomize
