Yo I'm just eating dinner now. U ready to go out?
Ya ya. Where you eating?
Cereal and beer. U kno u want in.
worse things have happened to me. but if it will make you feel better you can pay for my therapist sessions next week.
You know you're hung over when your pose in art class is lying face down on the platform
He brought Stephanie home from the black light party. Apparently he has night vision beer goggles
We're discussing which museums we should go to when we shroom. How ill would Picasso be?
Dude I've kinda accepted I may leave Nola with the clap.
Things I just found under my covers: protein bar, string cheese, vibrator.
Btw if you ever get emails that pretty much contain 'bwahhhhh jatkkvsweuo' it's safe to assume it's me.
Calm the fuck down fatty, you can add creme de menthe to a vanilla shake any time of the year
Had sex in a cemetery last night during a thunderstorm. I feel like my goth points have skyrocketed
I found them in the bathroom trying to wrap an American flag around Steve's dick. I didn't bother to ask questions.
He yelled "I'm Bruce Springsteen!" when he came. This is why I don't sleep with guys from Jersey.
I had sex while you were puking this morning and I'm sorry. Kind of.
It's ok. I had sex while you were drunk crying last night. We're even.
She's just a lonely cunt and i hope she stays that way for the rest of her fucking life.
This seems like an over reaction to someone eating your fries.
My life. Always pantsless and occasionally topless.
Randomize
