what ever happened to devon sawa?
fuck...who knows?
i'm really worried about him.
And then falling down drunk the next morning, concussing yourself and splitting your head open?
That was pretty sad, but you more than made up for it by using "concussing" in a sentence
I want to see you every morning in the kitchen ass naykid on roller blades making pancakes.
Stop sending me these texts. This is your mom, not your girlfriend.
You said you wanted to go to louisiana and get arrested by Steven segal
Everybody was literally kung fu fighting
After the VIP Latina experience at the strip club last night, I am rooting for Mexico in this years World Cup.
It's like there testing me. My dad kept handing me margaritas and saying "you can take it"
frankly if you're gonna get kicked out of your place, hooking up with your gay roommate's boyfriend would be the most entertaining way to do it.
i was able to set 4 alarms to make sure i woke up in time for class but i couldnt take the open beer out of my pocket before i did cartwheels down the hall...
I'm walking home wearing Kermit the frog footie pajamas, carrying a monogrammed shot glass set with my name on it. It's fucking Christmas!
Okay do all 29 year olds have erectile dysfunction or just the two I've slept with?
A guy with the name Pootie Tang winked st me and a guy that doesn't speak English messaged me. These are my choices?
My parents just told me that if I stop drinking I could do something great with my life...
They obliviously haven't seen you dance on top of a pool table then
You think I'll get the "I used to stick it to your daughter" discount?
No no. Thank you. Killed multiple birds with one penis.
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