Every time we go downtown I ask myself why we live in Des Moines
i've counted 4 condom wrappers but only 3 condoms. not again.
normal stoners make pot brownies. gay stoners make pot chocolate covered cherries on a cinnamon graham cracker crust which by the way are very effective.
I think he just gave me the 'I used to sleep with your sister' discount
If you were curious as to how many pounds of bagged marijuana can fit in the trunk of a 2010 Chevrolet Aveo, we now have the answer
Of all the shitty people we associated with, you should be happy that I'm the one fucking your cousin. Sorry.
I look like a zombie and smell like a stripper. Its gonna be a good day.
Was I holding a cat when you saw me? Because that was the height of that party for me.
Your boobs are like a big quesadilla marker
You and the dog were competed for the water dish
The pool of urine in the trash can signifies both a regretful yet successful night.
He said he remembers me...standing on a snowy roof, smoking a blunt, yelling "you're pretty fly for a white guy" at him. Sounds about right.
His face matches his life choices. Both are train wrecks.
I have got to stop telling people I was almost a prositute every time I drink
dude I fucking saw you snort tequila
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