third eye blind makes so much more sense now that i have a drug problem
He was at the bottom of the stairs showering himself with the popcorn, then eating a few handfuls and running around.
Promise me you won't have sex in my room
I can't promise you that, but I promise you that I'll try
Might want to in your tub tho. That thing is fucking huge.
Dude, we apparently put a washing machine drum in that back of your truck with the full intention of making a bonfire in it.
Nobody knows who they are, but they have an ice luge so they are welcome in my book
Dude I just saw a beer truck w taps in the side... It's like god heard my prayers and sent me a gift from heaven
So, I'm about to take my pants off in the Walmart parking lot, when am old lady parks next to me. I'm all the way in the back next to the semis. What the hell?
So I'm pretty sure I told every one at the party that "I'm going to fuck my pillow pets tonight?"
I'm making poor life decisions again. Tune in tomorrow to see how much I hate life.
What procrastination leads to: I have submitted a third of my job applications this week with a BAC that would get me arrested
I got your flops too. But yeah you rolled off your raft a bunch of times so we had to ask the white trash squad to help you back on. You bit one of them
On the flip side Weston asked if he could move me to Wisconsin to be his "moto hoe" which is actually a thing apparently
I can't hang out tomorrow. A boy wants to feed me ice cream and touch my boobs. Priorities.
I just came rly close to telling a dude that I want to chew on him and there should be an oil painting of his ass up in the louvre before I realized that isn't how flirting is supposed to go
You ever sit back and realize our friendship is based off us ranting at each other with random animal photos thrown in
Randomize
