WHY WOULD YOU LET ME MAKE THAT MUCH NOISE DURING SEX IN RESIDENCE ?!
I tried to push your face into the pillow but then you kicked like a donkey.
I love tequila.
i walked in on him listening to enya, jacking off, and vomiting into a cup on his desk. are you serious.
cum and cheesecake for breakfast...don't fucking tell me pride week isn't awesome
Ill bet we could have atleast fucked a girl who fucked a guy who has fucked tara reid. That's a famous circle right?
Should I tell her she gave me head in the kitchen while I was eating a cupcake or would that hurt her dignity too much?
I cannot tell if the couch is cold or I spilled beer. THAT kind of night.
I walked into your room and you had fallen asleep smoking a cigarette. You just had the butt in your mouth with ash all over your face.
Multiple bruises and a hell of a headache later, I have still to find out where the fuck I picked up the bottom half of a mannequin.
Me too, I feel like I pinched your nipples excessively. At the time it seemed like a good idea, but in retrospect I'm not so sure.
Only thig bad about that muscular chick from the gym is she liked it so rough I had to bust out a few wrestling moves from highschool
I told you that you should stop drinking and you responded "Thanks for telling me how to live, North Korea!"
Remember the time you puked your contact lens out?
They also submitted to my demands for pizza
I would just like to say that I had morning sex today to the Hamilton soundtrack. So.
I just had a visual of u banging and screaming at him at the same time.
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