Getting drunk in a different country is not a good idea. Lets just say spanish women, 17 yr olds from missouri, prostitutes, and a poodle. I don´t want to leave spain.
I just want to hang out with her.
You're a liar. Why do I have to give you reasons you can't have sex with my mom? I hate you.
What kind of soap washes out shame, bad decisions, and whiskey?
Irish Spring?
this girl im hooking up with thought my ring was a purity ring... apparently im taking it too slow
I'm eating cereal out of the pocket of my flannel right now
i have my graded calc test (94%) sitting on my empty case of beer next to my desk. this is me winning at college.
I searched the house and found a small bottle of sherry which is probably as old as I am, has prob gone off and tastes like shit. I don't care any more. It has come to this.
It's getting increasingly easier to use his emotional instability to my advantage. That's about all he has going for him right now.
Excuse me hold on, hooking up with someone who is verified on twitter is like being important.
I just want a pillowcase full of fast food so I can eat and sleep this hangover away
She pinched my nipples out of nowhere as I was about to come... I think I found god
Nothing says "class act" like eating acid in the middle of a Buffalo Wild Wings
I told her it would be awesome. We are all the same people. One of us would always be drunk, one of us would always be hooking up, and one of us would always be crying into a pancake.
Some guy at the bar last night bought us Arrowhead water and I was so drunk, it tasted good
Grabbed the cop's ass and he still arrested Heather instead. Victory is mine!!
Randomize
