There's something fitting about a hot in-car interracial makeout to the tune of 'healing the world.' RIP Mike.
Turns out you're obligated under man law to share any passwords you may have for porno sites
Is that what they're teaching u at that bar review class?
Instead of having sex, we spent the entire night making pillow forts and have sword fights. I think I'm in love
i got totally wasted at 2pm and cleaned the house bc i was bored. my mom now supports my alcohol problem
oh, it's pms. I almost cried yesterday bc my roommates didn't seem perky enough when I got home.
You said you were going to take the sideview mirror to your own car so that nobody would steal it. Thats why you woke up with it.
Apparently, I kept going on about how i'm going to name my first born Ramen. I think this is a good parenting move.
She said we "made love." I had to explain to her that when both parties agree that the first time time they have sex both people agree to video tape the whole thing its not "making love" but more like random good time fun sex.
To give you an idea, there's a group upstairs trying to break down a door with their fists and heads.
What's his name?? He crossfits 6 times a week, works in finance & is into the occasional felony class drug. His name is irrelevant in order to know if I wanna bone him again.
I swear to god if you eat that last piece of pie while I'm gone I will never speak to you again. I'm so serious.
Dead. I am actually dead. Also, worst nightmare confirmed: throwing up in a four hundred person lecture.
did you just correct my grammar and then send me a photo of your dick?
Its that time in the evening when I've had a few cocktails and wish you'd make a video about the packers and Jack Daniels.
She was shaving her legs in the neighbors pool when we found her.
Where'd she get the razor?
Not the point.
Randomize
