I took off my clothes and she wanted to have sex. But then she changed her mind. So we ended up fucking through her panties or something. I don't know it was weird.
Fuck 8am classes
Dear Jesus I'm gonna throw up through my eyes
I feel violated. a guy just did an ultrasound on my balls. He made eye contact..
I bought the tickets, he brought the weed. thanks to you, we had to roll a joint out of my bible paper.
You better be watching. There will be a POP quiz. Each correct answer gains you 5 more minutes of the sexual act of your choice
it got awkward when the only couple not hooking up was just watching..
I also referred to her clitorous as her "vagina dot" last night...probably going to be dumped soon.
After a certain blood-alcohol level, the dog is in charge.
Go big or go home. i snuck in two beers in my bra. im here to win.
Having my alarm go off at 3:30 makes me wanna rip my dick off and shove it through my eye socket
if a girl cums in a dorm room and no one hears it did it really happen?
She had a baby Jesus butt plug
I peed in front of kids, unfortunately
I let a 30 year old guitar player that works at a call center go down on me in his backseat last night
It was all like "my feathers evolved from scales of a reptile bitches!!" and I was all like "damn this chocolate milk is AWW SOOME!"
Randomize
