sooo how much is appropriate to spend on a vibrator? what if it is really legit looking?
If I remember correctly, I may have been smoking a cigarette on the dance floor. This is the true sign of a douchebag in his native habitat...fmylife
Just set a new record on Need For Speed at the arcade. Had to enter Tiger Woods as the name.
You know you're fucked up when you throw your phone on the roof of the bar to show how good the Otter Box works.
Wtf. I just got invited to a threeway bj session in the bathroom at boiler. Lmao
there is an extreme lack of margarita in my mouth.
Bro... You handed me an ice cube from your drink and said "tell me if it tastes like pickles".
Btw. Being a stripper for a week without anyone knowing to pay off my school loan is no longer in my agenda.
I'm at the point where I'm gonna write in my mothers bday card. Happy birthday. Please stop having sex with the door open.
Aka reading hardcore gay robot porn as a steady trickle of elementary schoolers walk by me every so often and im still in uniform as there councilor
Who is also still dressed up as a pirate
nothing like having plan b for breakfast in a cvs parking lot before ordering this semester's textbooks
I'm beginning to think that women just have dogs at home as an excuse to leave ASAP after hooking up, without sounding like a typical guy.
she's a drunken disney princess. so basically me if i had a crown and no desire for independence.
It's something you'd find in the room outside of Ben Carson's sex dungeon
I'm no doctor but I don't think balls are supposed to look like that.
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