I have had sex with more partners than how old he is.
Getting high on the stoop of a brownstone in the middle oh harlem. Doesn't get much more hey arnold than this.
i almost got kicked out of the rave because i was trying to get in on some couple's makeout sessions
THEY SHOULD WARN YOU WHEN THEY MAKE JELLO SHOTS WITH JACK DANIELS!!! THEY SHOULD WARN YOU!!!!!!!
If you fuck her, Im going to call you and I want you to cough 2 times.
Why yes actually, getting stoned and reading an AARP magazine IS totally where I wanted my night to end!
I saw a picture of my dad holding my legs in a kegstand. Town festival=success.
I will give you the couch, a small portion of the fridge, and plenty of beer.
Got my future figured out. I'm oddly comforted. Thanks, bro.
Oh I'm definitely going to hit on her, there's no question about that. What I meant by playing it cool is I'm not going to mount her on sight.
I will forever remember this as The Great Jalepeno Cock Burn of 2014.
nobody was home so I boiled the dildo
is telling someone you can be his trophy wife the same as proposing?
For a girl who cried from fear the last time she was asked out, this. Is. TERRIFYING!
I just woke up and I don't really remember anything past 1pm. How much am I missing?
A good 10-11 hours. You got laid twice. Also, you out-ran a cop and played football with a lamp.
when she didn't finish her burrito you wanted to call the cops because you said it was neglect
Randomize
