Dude, I would hit that so hard that whoever could pull me out would become the king of England
GOING OUT OF BUSINESS: we're having a foreclosure party tonight...We'll also be raffling off a washer/dryer, microwave and a white tiger head.
Just interrupted a freshman tour to ask where the sexual health center is. Figured I'd just give us all what we were really looking for.
The girl with a dislocated arm just did an assisted keg stand. You will never have an excuse again.
He was pretty wasted I guess, but the crippled guy threw the first punch it was awesome
I woke up next to her boyfriend and she woke up next to mine....
This is like a fucked up game of musical chairs.
if I just puked into my own hand, but then cleaned it up quickly, quietly, and calmly, am I still a trainwreck?
we got kicked out of her coke dealer's house when we wouldn't stop quoting "a league of their own"
communist
And to add, there was a fat guy right next to me who, when the girls would shake their butts, he would let out a shrill xena warrior princess cheer
We have your weave and dirt in our room.
I was figuring I'd break up with her after work, but before Taco Tuesday
lesbians are really intense tho, she made me take her eye makeup off and told me she was going to eat me for breakfast
all i want in life is a shot and a cock is that too much to ask
Can you hurry up? Jamie just challenged my ex boyfriend to a duel and someone honest to God handed her a sword?
She didn't have her own?
there's a giant awkward home-wrecking elephant in the room. and its name is meg.
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