Apparently at one point I was wearing my sweatshirt backwards like it was normal and then I threw up into the hood. Never drinking again.
There's a girl in my class named "La-a" pronouced "Luh Dash uh" I hate everyone
And by the way, how is me getting head even remotely comparable to you fucking 3 guys?
yeah, he just sent me a picture of himself with his shirt off.... It didnt turn me on, it just made me want to buy him a big mac....
I think you're asking the wrong person. You don't understand. Like I would fuck the act of fucking itself if I could.
Wore last nights jeans to Christmas Dinner with the fam, found a half gram of blow, while they're praying ill be railing.
I thought he was joking about the hundred beer challenge until two guys showed up with a camera and boom mic. This cabin party is going to be fucked
There was a photo of his face glued to a lifesize Kim Kardashian cutout. By the end of the night he was doing shots out of medicine cups and making everybody hug it goodbye.
I really shouldn't be this use to hearing "YOURE THAT GIRL?!?!"
I woke up to my roommate checking my pulse
Nothing will stop me from making the title of my paper "The Great Political Cock Block." Absolutely nothing.
You told me you were trying to learn all the MLB ballparks while you waited for your porn to load.
At the bar in my pajamas again
Ummm that is the 3rd time this week and it is Wednesday
after last night, ive never not wanted to live so much in my life.
I stole a block of cheese from the party last night and put it in my purse but I got so drunk that I left my purse on the floor and my dog ate it.
Randomize