is it gross that my labia hangs so much that guys can't find my clit?
all thats left of you is your magnum wrapper on my dresser
Why did you video tape me drying my boxers in the microwave?
this kid in class is playing minesweeper and just slammed the desk because he lost. thank god were normal.
Weird question, would you want to do fetish porn? you get paid.
im youtubing treadmill accidents. this is what i do at 2:10am
ambylanc
what?
there was an amgbulance. iw ish i was in it.
High enough to ask the woman at best buy if she ever feels like she's swimming. and telling the man outside that he smells like happy juice.
I met his dad. Turns out he was a one nighter from the nurses conference in Vegas. Not sure how to handle this one.
Clearly, you already have. Both of them.
Its honestly only a matter of time before I punch him in the face... I'll try to control myself until you guys break up
he came to me for relationship advice and we ended up fucking in my backseat
just reached the point where my breast implants paid from themselves in free drinks.
My mom just asked me about the teeth marks on my headboard..
Beer Olympics must happen in honor of the legit Olympics.
I am a taco. I am also really high.
I've always seen you more as a chimichanga.
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