Of course it's dangerous. Why else would they hire us after we failed the drug test?
we found you outside the hotel room sleeping with a note next to you that said " we made sure you were comfortable, hope your friends come back soon"
Remember middle school health class where we used to say that when we lost our vcards we would be on the pill, using a condom, and have had our partners tested first? We were so optimistic.
Apparently Bin Ladens last act of terrorism is cock blocking me....
So I've gone into the break room to heat up a styrofoam cup 8 times over the course of 4 hours.. that desperate to see him. Now I have a broken heart AND cancer.
She wasnt impressed wen i brought a guy for her back with me, a 3am impromptu sperm donor is not a gd birthday present. Im a bad gf.
I just want to curl up with him and brush his hair and sing love songs together, I think you should come over and end this
At this point the smell of shame has become my natural musk
This gem of a conversation has been brought to you be weed
Only you could make a reflective vest look even remotely sexy
I just feel like I'm worth a little bit more than your recycled nudes...
At one point I was counting his nipple hairs to calm myself down.
he was Irish, I had to have sex with him.
I don't know who's idea it was to get wine for a frat party but my poor pitiful hung over self really fucking hates them.
She’s a Vegas 8, which makes her an Oklahoma 27
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