Dude, Erin Andrews has a nude video circulating the internet.
Is it any good?
Let me put it this way: I bet Stuart Scott's lazy eye went straight after watching that.
just found my calculator watch from 6th grade. the hipster transformation is complete
It's almost summer. We need to start reconnecting with our home drug dealers.
He googled the address of the bar, then sent me a text saying "6.3 miles. Too far. :( Apparently I am only worth a 5 mile radius.
She poured a bottle of rum in the champagne fountain, did like 5 jello shots at the same time, then lit herself on fire. Twice. This is how everyone should turn 21.
There is a visibable outline from you in the grass. its you in the fetal position...
One thing noone tells you about getting put in the drunk tank is do it barefoot. You get free flipflops.
I find it worrying that she bit me in bed. Then proceeded to write her name in bite marks. All without ever losing the rhythm of our fucking.
Of course I have to cross through a walk for hunger
I literally stopped banging her when my ESPN app alerted me that the Spurs had won. That's how much I hate Lebron. I would rather watch him cry in the post game interviews than get it in
I wish more of my problems were easily solvable by taking a good long shit.
He took me home and by the time I woke up after catching up on sleep I realized I accidentally put on one of his fiances socks. whoops.
Oh my god if I have to go on fetlife to find a guy who will fuck me right around here, I'm going to scream.
DO NOT TRY TO APPROACH HER CAT. IT IS A DEMON CAT FROM SATAN'S BALLS AND IT *WILL* TRY TO KILL YOU. I SPEAK FROM EXPIRENCE.
Does the girl you just banged want anything from Taco Bell?
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