So we made editble underwear with fruit roll ups and fruit by the foot
there is no way he can be that small
look on the bright side he'll over comepensate
My poor mother should have just stuffed me back up her vagina when she had the chance.
I think I just broke my ankle. I've only had one beer. I'm getting drunk before I go to the ER so it's less embarassing.
Don't do anything you wouldn't want to explain to paramedics
But that's half the fun of it
I am going to borrow your water/shock proof video camera for St. Pattys day so that if wake up next to the highway again I know why.
Ok but I hold the right to any footage of you getting slapped, puking, anything with body shots, and allowed to make a montage of it to put on youtube.
nothing like smoking out of your roommate's bong with your mom to celebrate the rising of christ
he is risen halelujah
Nope not happening. When I close my eyes the floor moves. I'm going to enjoy this free roller coaster.
Theres a point where you stop and say hey....as high as I am on LSD right now ...I`m just a man covered in paint
Dude. I've never been with a guy who just wanted to go down on me all the time including while I'm shooting zombies on call of duty. My life is complete.
And now I have a massive dip in and a Bloody Mary that would catch on fire if you put a flame close to it, with no pants on... At 8:15Am. Being single is pretty legit
I just laughed so hard that my back cracked so hard that I thought I was cumming. Magic
On the shuttle bus from the Casino the driver refused to take us to the strip club so you said "let me off this bus or ill puke on you".
i'm growling thTa how much i wNn slwwwp.
save me some of whatever you're doing i'll be there in five.
If he ever pulls my hair again, I'm going to conveniently have lock jaw. Then he can decide whether pain during sex is still fucking appealing.
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