hook me up with the drugs dog keep up the good work
yea..i want to get out of new york for a bit too but for the love of god not to new jersey. that's like getting tired of the stripclub and getting yourself a toothless prostitute.
good. and stop kissing my girl you dirty slut.
i don't think she's still your girl..plus, she kept screaming "kiss me! i'm a lesbian!" last night so i think you're outta luck..
Well, she opened the door to puke outside the car, but she threw it open so hard it popped back and hit her in the face.
Currently doing my walk of shame down a floating dock. No more guys who live on a boat EVER AGAIN
He came over drunk in a speedo i told him he has my vote he said who are you voting for when i said obama he took off running and shouting i was worthless like an empty beer can
cant tell, his cock is acting like one of those inflatable arm waving things outside the market
Getting "I couldn't find the front door so I climbed in through window" drunk seems to be a habit of yours
This morning I found four opened yet full beers on my desk and my towel rack pulled off the wall and in bed with me
I'm pretty sure male strippers are the last things I need in my life right now.
If you fall asleep, my vagina and I will never forgive you.
Monday funday. I brushed my teeth with antibacterial soap. hangover I did not have.
We used to bone, but now she's my life coach.
Then he asked if he could pee on me and things really went downhill
Got baptized for New Years. In champagne and cheap vodka.
Randomize
