Anything crazier than usual happen? I woke up in a stairway with my cock out.
So My parents cut me off after I started making blood marys with hienz ketchup
i've never been more proud of someone than i was when he told me he got his first blowjob at age 13...from two chicks
I may or may not have puked in my RA's suggestion box.
We did a shot for each one. Father... son... and holy ghost. That wasn't enough though so we moved on to toasting dead relatives.
not sure how we got back down, broken rib says we didn't use stairs
Dude, please wake him up, there are pills all over the floor and hes the only one who knows which ones to take simultaneously.
Guess what I signed up for?!?!?!
Please tell me you're not selling your eggs.
I have my vibrator between my thighs and I'm listening to high school musical. That kind of high. We're all in this together.
Let me know. Show me one boob if yes. 2 if no
My brain and heart say thanks but my vagina isn't super pleased with you right now
Should I be concerned that the new guy I'm seeing just referred to my stealing a sailboat in college while drunk as "wholesome"?
When she says 'Polish hangover cure' she just means more vodka. Don't do it.
Let me just get through this whole court subpoena thing and then ill go back to buying alcohol for minors.
I'm pretty sure she tried to draw a self portrait out of her vomit. Then you tried to help, but passed out in the vomit.
Randomize
