can you pick up canola oil? she lives by wegmans
who is canola oil?
you're an idiot.
I do not want to touch your penis after this conversation.
He went down on me and then slapped my ass saying "thanks for the confidence boost"... is this all I'm good for?
btw good call for not making out for a pitcher of vodka, this hangover is bad enough
please dont make me drink to the titanic soundtrack
for future reference: playing drunken strip-twister is a euphemism for a threesome. just thought you should know.
Should I feel bad that my boyfriend pays for my birth control and his friends get to reap the benefits?
I think rescheduling my finals around when Im going to be hungover is responsible
Just faked two orgasms bc I had too much wine and remembered mid sex that I bought doritos yesterday.
Lets play hurricane shelter. And the shelter is my bed, and we forgot our clothes.
Nobody knows who they are, but they have an ice luge so they are welcome in my book
we're drinking bellinis i mean god's titty nectar
sorry for pouring tequila vodka and whiskey down your throat and left you to sleep on a table
To be fair, this is a tequila-while-rewatching-Benedict-Cumberbatch-as-Van-Gogh idea, so I don't know if it will hold up tomorrow.
The coke machine at work is laughing at me. Literally. I just heard laughter from the coke machine
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