I was hooking up with him in my car, he wouldn't stop with my nipples, I had to literally beat him off of me. He kept groaning too while he was doing it. Sick.
Mommy issues
I don't know what your problem is but seriously you're a cunt for throwing up that song on your page. It's rude as fuck
omg its myspace i didnt think anyone took that seriously anymore
Just watched Hilary Duff have a three-some on Gossip Girl...all I could imagine was that LIzzie Maguire cartoon girl freaking out above their heads
I never once brought up his unibrow when he was insulting me. That's class.
It was only 12:11 and I needed to make a Pepto Latte and call it a night, I don't remember that being part of my new years resolution.
thanks for the bloody nose. you probably dont remember, i'm not mad.. only because your boobs are to blame
Oh, I never thought you were a dick. You were one of the best morally comprised ideas I've ever had.
Idk man, she was drunker than me and i was sitting there talking to a raccoon about it's broken leg.
My brain is like scrambled eggs. If scrambled eggs were trying to escape out of my skull through my forehead.
Most people would probably take his lack of responses as a queue to stop. But nope, not me. I just keep going. And that's why I don't have a bf, just a little weinered friend
We decided to try to steal hot dogs but it ended up with me punching him in the face and crying. Pretty solid night
So, if you were also having sex around 11pm, then we were legitimately being penetrated at the exact same time. That is amazing. We are soul sisters.
They made the paper for stealing gnomes. I fucked a local celebrity.
On a scale of having tea with Ghandi to the apocalypse how bad of an idea is it to drink with a 100 degree fever?
We smell like vodka and hangover
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