worst 3rd wheel sitch ever. i'm crammed into a booth with him and chubs mcgee and his hand is between her legs. thank youuu karma.
Dude, I found out the hard way that she wipes back to front. I ate her out and had to throw up.
she then came into the room and yelled I'M GOING TO BE A COCK BLOCK for 5 minutes
Nope it's a specific set of cards not like a normal ace, queen king thing....kinda like UNO, but instead of yelling UNO you get shitfaced
Today I learned you can't titshake with a corset on.
the first sign of life we got from you was four hours later. you smiled without opening your eyes when tom whispered in your ear we were getting buffalo wings.
someone who i have in my phone as thundercock just said he was DTF
Does peppermint hummus sound good or am I just high?
I feel like having peed on eachother is a point in our lives we should never have gotten to...
his version of basketball was throwing hot sauce packets down my cleavage at taco bell at 2 am with his buddy.the cashier kept score
He fingered me and now wants me to go get plan b because of it. WE'RE IN COLLEGE.
It's cuz all she eats is salt lick, human souls, and fast food
What's the worst that could happen? I'm already broke and my leg's already broken
11% beer and firearms, what could possibly go wrong?
All I've done is masturbate and drink while being home from college.
Randomize
