Do you feel that fire radiating from matt's crotch for you
Gross. gingers suck
omg, he ripped it...he ripped my vagina...best. night. ever.
so he let me use one of the toothbrushes that came in his daughters 4 pack, purple glittery toddler toothbrush, the next time i came back his wife has used their label maker and put my name on it...
The girl sitting next to me in class is writing her to-do list under the title 11/31.
i was in the bathroom puking my brains out, a girl walked in and said "i just came to do the same thing" so i told her i would move over and share the toilet. its better than being alone.
normally i'm against accepting campers on facebook but this one saw me giving head to another counselor and didn't say shit about it to my boss so i feel like shes earned the right to look at my sloppy drunk pictures
dude I heard her through my door. She sounded like you were holding her head under water and they letting her up for air. I recorded that shit
Just say you're the husband at the front desk to get in. She's in room 15 at the ER.
what? who is this?
next photo in the 'cherished memories' series- Jess's bed. Note the vomit actually UNDER the pillows. shes a genius.
No, man, we stole the housekeeper's key and we're just going room to room raiding mini fridges. Hurry
Logan has the vodka and snickers. We're making a run for it. Room 302
idk, it started getting weird when they were looking up videos of lesbian giraffes
Like tbh you're not doing anything that screams I'm drunk and yet nothing says I'm going to spend $30 on McDonalds and make out with a stranger like that picture
apparently I kept repeating I have a to do list this summer and he's on it
I'm not gonna plow a chick in front of her 14 year old brother....
I'm not drunk or hungover and I don't have to work. My body is sooo confused!
Randomize
