I just needed to know whether or not to wear panties to work tomorrow.
I'll put it this way. My grandkids felt that fuck.
We need to play Chardee MacDennis. Contact me when you have an available date. This is not a question.
yea, there's something about a stripper whipping you with your own belt that makes you think
We told you to go get more fire wood and you came running back with a log that was on fire, not drunk at all.
We were having an argument with his friends mom about whether it was worse that he bootycalled me at 4 a.m. or that I bootycalled him at 12 in the afternoon
THAT FUCKER WASTED TWO OF MY COLORED CONDOMS! HE DIDN'T EVEN FUCKING FINISH IN IT HE JUST SLAPPED IT ON AND WASTED IT!
If your boss lets you sleep on his couch, you don't pay him back by boning his daughter.
Wednesday is good, I needed the head count for the orgy, caroling can happen with as few as 2 people. There will be a pinata.
For the caroling or the orgy?
Sailor Jerry came over for the evening. It was a magical evening. I didn't even get puke in the house.
Probably gonna run and pray I throw up. Then go get a coffee/bagel & continue to rally
He's going to wonder why I have burn marks on my asshole
You KNOW it was a good night when you find French fries AND taco remnants in your bra when you get home...
we tried to make a drinking game out of 4 pokemon cards you found in a drawer.
Any luck with the purse?
No, though I did find her weed. Also her sons name is King. I'm uncertain how I feel about that
Randomize
