Is there a "Plan B" app for my iphone?
I have no idea where we are. But it doesn't look dirty so I don't think we are in jersey yet
debating whether or not to save the package from my first plan b pill. it would be a nice addition to any baby book.
I'm high and craving hash browns from McDonalds. Please pick me up. I also would like a hug and a supportive pat on the back when you get here. Thanks.
Its two in the afternoon. McDonalds don't sell hash browns at 2 in the afternoon. Whore. The hug I can provide however.
My therapist thinks I shld paint u something to show u my appreciation 4 ur friendship. 1) she must think I'm rite on the brink of no friends 2) this is real
I was talking about you wanting my dick, but that works too
I let a drunk, gay man in a dragon costume motor-boat me. With his dragon head.
Why do you hate her?
She's dating the best penis that has ever entered my vagina.....
Are you planning on wandering into construction sites drunk and falling down 6' holes?
probably
I got hella high today and freaked out about life and interest rates
I'm kinda glad you won't be in Vegas tomorrow because you'd make us go streaking or throw dead animals at them.
I just met a drunk old lady with a bedazzled life alert alarm around her neck. I love casinos
Just to clear things up, yes you did lick the strippers butt
false alarm, still single
Last night I realized my life is an experiment of really bad decisions when I had to leave without my underwear. But at least I'm expanding my life experience.
Randomize
