you were the other women for BOTH people in the relationship?
Just woke to a Christmas wrapped pack of hotdogs in my bathtub. How high did we get?
i just stepped in cum. i hate you.
Thats what happens when you don't swallow.
areolas are like halos for boobs.
You get to witness red pubes. I'm almost jealous. That's like my dream.
So he thinks I sent him a picture of my boob last night, but it was really just a close up of my arm.
Its not christmas eve unless I give him head. I wont take no for an answer
The kid across the hall found me in the hallway using a hot pocket box as a pillow. I said its okay I live here.
You're still my best friend even though you continue to pass out on random toilets every time you drink
ever bang a guy wearing an $800 suit? today you will.
I feel like this is something I should shave my legs for
then he told me my boobs feel like "if you put mushroom soup in a baggie." I don't know how I'm supposed to feel about this.
the day i stop sending you hentai screenshots is the day i actually act like an adult, and TRUST ME. THAT AINT HAPPENING ANYTIME SOON.
Is it disrespectful or patriotic to pole dance on an american flag pole?
Joke’s on you. I got to talk to a furry about why nukes are bad and why musicals are good.
I woke up to the smell of shame and vomit in my hair... went to the bathroom to shower and passed out... woke back up naked with the blow dryer on... thanks for making my birthday a success
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