Seeing him suck some chick's face on VH1 wasn't exactly how I imagined the "we should see other people" conversation going.
about to get into a hot tub with three cops. this cant go well
Just asked the bartender if I could use the register to see my grades.
Dude she was 62...with a boob job. And I'm proud to say I made out with that.
Spotted: woman loading franzia into a toddler-sized shopping cart for her child to push. Beautiful.
I'm pretty sure last night was the first time I've seen someone drink beer-soaked paper towels. Ever.
How do you not remember seeing the kid from our chem lab table and repeatedly yelling "lab partners for life!" at him?
And I would just like to take the time to say my boobs look great today.
I slept with him because his girlfriend should know better than to be with him given is reputation. It was like sex and a lesson all in one.
Just found dollar bills in my sheets. What part of the weekend am I forgetting?
That said I did get head on the roof of a 15 story building which, regardless of quality, is still cool
Aint no party like a Broke College Girls Eating Stuffed Crust Pizza party
My car insurance payment showed up today, so no inflatable hot tub for now. Sorry to disappoint.
Yeah I either headbutted a street sign while texting or I defended you two from an evil gang of nazi muggers. I was black out so I am gonna assume it was option b.
He was so drunk last night. He woke up out of a dead sleep at 330am, walked over to the dresser, opened his middle drawer and proceeded to pee. When I woke up and asked him Wtf he was doing, he told me it was fake pee and blamed it on the cat...we don't have a cat
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