no it's cool...i'm just drinking and studying...cool night
Goddamn it, are you fucking her sister?
did you know it's going to storm tonight?
You bitch. At least tell Laura she's a better kisser.
how was your night?
well, i just purchased 'sorry for being a drunk whore' cupcakes. how do you think my night was?
Just mixed Baileys and yoohoo. I feel like an alchoholic 2nd grader.
By the way, turns out "Danny B" is his penis. Not his cousin. I was right.
You insisted I take photos of you vomiting off the top of the tree.
I don't know what you're talking about but its dick galore in the tub. We will be getting poked tonight. Bring forks.
Oh you don't have to buy a shower curtain, I stole the one from her bathroom. It has dolphins on it.
I told him he was probably the first guy to get fucked while wearing Star Wars pyjamas.
Sorry I couldn't reference you in my facebook quote. I will redirect any likes and comments straight to my blowjob efforts this week.
My breasts were aching with rage.
I just bought a bong from a hot dog stand.
Are you sure he's still you're boyfriend when you're sober?
If he doesn't fuck you on the 4th of July, he doesn't really love this country.
Did u puke in a church parking lot? And go to the wrong funeral yesterday? Lol
Randomize
