How was Slumdog? Did it pull your heartstrings?
It was entertaining. Better than most other Mexican films.
I'll hook up with guys I don't even like, as long as they leave early enough the next day.
What?? I'm covered in blood at the hospital, I atleast deserve a pic of someones boobs
Well, I just hope you know I had your best interests at heart when I put your sandwich down my pants.
You love him. Dinosaurs. Math. Sex.
At our floor meeting the RA was talking about bathroom hygiene and I really wanted to be like "what about shower sex."
Valid question
I own a halfway home for drunk girls, this is my life
Do you have any need for a scary clown mask?
It is completely possible to eat beef jerky sexually.
A group of drunk Marines just serenaded me, never leaving this place
He was "hot guy in the dark". One of us had to sleep with him. I took the bullet you're welcome.
Dude I'm at a Marijuana dispensary party. They are giving away BAGS of edibles
How do you keep ending up in these situations?
My dad is their accountant
Well I took a spicy wing shit in a field this morning.
i had a flashback to you roaring like a dying tiger and then throwing your wallet (maybe?) at the cat in the living room and saying "you're the only adult that lives here take all my money"
Can’t. Tonight’s a netflix and dick night
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