She was drunk and kept trying to talk while I was in her mouth. It sounded like the teacher from a Charlie Brown cartoon!
well I can't set my house on fire every night
I will show your tits more attention than Michael Jackson's death.
Whatever it was. it was pregnant.
So J keeps drinking his last bit of drink, then spitting it out and drinks it again. Savor the flavor?
opening your purse in class to grab a pen only to find dollar bills and pink fuzzy handcuffs instead...that's a cool feeling
i'm pretty sure i'm on the same train we took last friday..
what?how do you know?
it appears they have not cleaned up your vomit yet.
Even the paramedic said "what a way to kill a party"
I have a challenge for you: find out where you are. you will receive Taco Bell if you succeed
It feels like im being cuddled by a thousand little smurf vaginas
Dude, chad is laying across the room, violently, passionately, pornographicly eating something and I seriously think the 'some thing' is fighting back.
I mostly blame me being such a miserable fuck on the fact that I was born on a Monday.
i guess she just walked over ass naked and peed on his laptop. gonna call an over price on that drunk sex.
This is the third time I have overheard parents tell their children "don't be that girl" in reference to me. I'm either doing something horribly wrong or amazingly right
Remember those neighbors I thought were FBI agents? Turns out they're DEA.
Randomize
