i don't know how boys match. i think shoes & belt are the only thing. it doesn't matter. i just know if they look stupid.
How do I get over judging people who I would be exactly like if I had a boyfriend
Get a boyfriend
just gave a homeless man a kiss in exchange for two handles
exact location. now.
He asked me why my bellybutton was so ugly... and wondered why i wasnt in the mood anymore.
I swear after i took it all i did was scream for four hours
You passed out and she managed to carry you all the way back to your dorm last night. I believe your testicles now her property.
Yes theres a double standard. Get over it. Fuck the critics and go be the slut you were born to be
being a senior sucks, I just started embracing my inner slutty college girl, and it's almost time to put her away...for like, ever. and i really like her.
Get a piano. I want to have sex on it.
Dude, the coffee is horrible this morning, Cass changed something about it
We ran out of Bailey's Irish cream...
This is what regular coffee tastes like?!?! Fuck the adult life.
I fucking love your mom. She's so drunk and fully functional. I aspire to be her one day.
I know you're on a date and I should leave you alone but about twenty minutes ago I realized I haven't been spanked in years so if you're still looking for a birthday present, you know, consider it.
He jizzed all over my ID badge. HR is gonna be pissed...
I wore Yonce braids out last night and made out with a man and a woman #bowdown is right
Well, I can't remember Thursday and my left ass cheek hurts like hell, I'm guessing Mike's bachelor party was a success.
Randomize
