I want to get so wasted that I make middle aged irish men look like mormon girls
drunk pissing on my closed toilet lid is actually quite a sobering experience
We had sex on the hood of my car and broke the windshield.
i don't even want to say how many boners i've caused this week
just threw up on my speech test, so much for a great semester
this kid woke up on our hotel floor and doesnt know how he got here
on my way back.. me and that kid will be great friends
I want a picture of impoverished children wearing Oregon national champions shirts.
Yes, I feel sorry for the tribe that gets those. They won't be able to hide from the lions.
mid blow job she looked up and said "we aren't even facebook friends!"
Heed the warning of the ghost of Oktoberfest present: German beer is soooooooo much better than our watered down children's piss. also lost all my clothes and am wearing lederhosen the rest of the trip.
I chugged a beer while I was riding him and he told me it was the sexiest thing he has ever seen. this guy knows class when he sees it.
I woke up with a half eaten bag of lettuce in my hand, wearing my Halloween costume from last year. Damn you tequila.
I dunno what's worse, that one guy here said he'd blow somebody for Tim Horton's right now, or that someone else looks like they want to test his sincerity.
Come get me, I'm fucking scared.
He was 6'5 and wearing a kilt, how could I not fuck him
I need water and some morals
You're a hot mess, you know that?
At least I'm a FUN hot mess. Like a train crash full of pizza, fireworks and glitter.
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