I drank enough to make her look pretty . . It worked and i threw up while going at it
there are definitely too many half naked pictures of me out there for me to ever be famous.
id fuck shawn from boy meets world only if we could name the baby topanga.
States back in the final four. Now our sunday night drinking has purpose. Sparty on baby.
My walk of shame was far more interesting today. He's moving and was cleaning out his apartment, so not only was I carrying my clothes, I also walked away with 4 bottles of cheap wine and a jar of ragu.
And then she banged "the first Italian rapper"
He just showed up to brunch with one shoe and only the battery from his phone.
so... the fat chick just walked over, shook my hand, then introduced herself as "versatile". shoot me now.
HEAR YE, HEAR YE! BY ROYAL DECREE, I WILL BE KNOCKING ON YOUR DOOR AT 2PM UNLESS YOU GET THE FUCK UP. IT'S 1:50. CIGARETTE TIME, BITCH. I LOVE YOU.
You were running around yelling "BUKAKE!" and squirting people with a shampoo bottle you found. Total shitshow.
get ready to load up the weird cannon and blow a load of buck-wildness all over the place people
Im hitting on this chick at a stoplight when all the sudden. i notice this chick blowing some dude in the backseat.
We shared a dick. We're practically sisters!
These tits shall not be calmed
Your vagina must be outstanding or have a secret entrance to Narnia if someone is will to fly from Texas for one night of it.
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