So how was he last night?
Five-minute foot-long.
Its about time the women of america have a president they can masturbate to again
I seriously can't date anymore I forgot how to hide my crazy
I cant remeber how long i've been laying here...it could be 10 minutes to a fucking day
Dude, at this rate we're going to get arrested a second time tonight.
Also managed to rip my pants and set myself on fire. And oddly enough I'm still not ready to ask for 2010 back.
We played alot of beer pong and ventured into the woods with tiki torches
6 tequila shots, 3 kamikazes and 1 rumplemintz.. The next day I puked in my office trash can while doing payroll. I may have to dock my own pay for lack of class.
she's just been through a whole lot lately. When the crazy starts leaking out we give her vodka and lock her in the room with all the pillows.
so that's what that room is for...
I think that thing where I have 2 boyfriends is happening again
I know you're very busy with sleep and things, but when you wake up we need to talk about weirdly shaped penises.
If you ever "miss" working, I'm going to fist you with my hulk hands. BOTH of them.
I didn't even know his name until he texted me the next day and told me I should take a plan B pill. Thanks Danny.
does 2pm fall under the wake n bake category?
You kept saying, "please sir, can I have some more."
Randomize
