everything was goin great until he pulled out his ed hardy lighter and smoked in my face like he was cool.
it's like you attract all the douchebags that nobody wants. people should thank you.
We have 10 gallons of home brew. And james has an amazonian blow dart weapon that sticks in bags and the wall. Come over
I don't fucking care about the convenience of not having freudian slips. I spent 2009-2011 screwing around with 3 different Daniels. 2012 WILL be the dawn of a new day
How about a mike?
Already had two of those
Both his mom and his sister were hitting on me when I stopped by today. He isn't a real friend anyway, right?
OK am i seriously the only one who thinks Cocaine Tuesdays is a bad idea?
The empty keg landed on my head. It's a good thing we already got shitfaced or i'd be a vegetable and the humor would be completely lost.
I woke up at 3am, my head in a toilet, still at the kegger, wearing a random cowboy hat.
If it meant we had chicks like that every weekend I would gay marry the shit out of you dude
I wonder if a fish could survive in vodka
I could
I mean there are things broken right and left, I woke up surrounded by dog statues, and we had a vodka bubble bath.
We hooked up with 2 friends last night as always and she stole their fucking cocaine and I just had to drive to their house and make her give it back to him hahshshahahah only me
Either of you know why the shower was on and the bathroom door wide open with no one in there at 6 in the morning?
just woke up and currently drinking copious amounts of eggnog straight from the carton to replenish the electrolytes lost last night
Don't tell him that you hope he dies in a boring missionary position with his wife. That doesn't go over well.
It's like those toothpaste commercials where 4 out of 5 dentists would recommend your vagina
Randomize
