Fuck their fairy tale bullshit. I shall ruin it. With a few thrusts of my cock.
i just bought ciggarettes using my court citation as id. I've reached an all time low.
Avril Lavigne as a judge on Idol wearing devil ears. it's like every boner you ever had in 2002 just came true.
The bong broke. we're having a little funeral followed by an inaugeration service for the new one
I tried to get you something for Valentine's Day too but they said they couldn't deliver skittles and ecstasy :(
I'm pretty sure we scarred one of our coworkers. This is the second time he has caught us both fully undressed and banging at work.
Either he has bad timing or he wants to join.
When we were fucking he said and I quote "we're like a sex fajita"
My boss just told me not to come back to work if I decide to drink. Challenge accepted.
Halfway through lecture, some kid in the front row threw up IN his hands. Professor held the door for him to carry it out.
i made up my own drinking game and i took a secret shot every time someone asked me about school or my future
I wish I could be at this cabin banging all these old dads
I may have been mad at the Supreme Court/patriarchy and tried to hate fuck myself.
Wait you actually sent a text to your self saying “love you I miss you"?
I just want to see his penis in the light. Is that a crime?
Just peed on the front lawn of the capital building. Great American.
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