i just fell asleep at my computer and i woke up and in the google bar it said delicious foods to eat
Situation: He got it in my eye, how long do I let it sting before should start to worry?
she said "the two best ways to sober up are to nurse someone or give a blowjob" and im gonna go along with it.
I'm sorry. I know you didn't expect me to be arm deep in vagina when you walked through the door.
Woke up this morning in a randoms bed clutching an airplane ticket. God I hope I'm still in the country
Woke up to a break up text for a facebook relationship I didn't even know I was in... 2012 is going to be a good year
I made her orgasm until she cried. Four years of only having sex with dudes and I've still got it.
I made out with an Italian cab driver. Not cool. Help. Good news he will drive us anywhere we want to go as long as you cook food?!?!?! I want to melt into the pavement.
I'm just gonna go with where the wind takes me. if it takes me to his dick, so be it.
my grandma just gave me a shoebox fulled to the top with tootsie rolls and condoms with a not that said "enjoy college, find a big cock" i'm not sure how I feel about this
Last night was good. Things got bad when I found a sledge hammer.
...I watched him run on the beach yesterday and I think I started ovulating
He's bringing a lesbian pretending to be his girlfriend to family Christmas. I can not wait to see how this goes.
I love everything about him! His penis, his hair, his tattoos, his penis, his cat, his penis.
just saw the most amazing side boob. i wanted to hold it.
Randomize
