uhhh i just had a guy tell me he's seen more jam bands and done more drugs than i could err imagine. what a turn on.
She thought I was gay, so I told her I'd be more comfortable with anal. She agreed.
So, halfway through sex he stops and starts crying. He said he's worried god hates him for all his bad decisions...think he meant to imply I was one of them...
she's walking down the hall in a thong and one flip flop and one ugg
just found glitter in my belly button...seriously when will this nightmare end
DON'T LET IAN EAT HIS PEANUT BUTTER!!!
Just remembered that I poured a whole bottle of tylenol in there. It's chunky. It's deadly.
until he told me my vag was like a juicy apple and he loved eating it, yes, i really did think we were both sober.
One day. I will touch his hair. I'm curious if it'll be like a soft cloud.
I'm like a magical alcohol dispenser. I pulled this kahlua out of my vagina.
Tranny group. Dance off. Horse hair and dicks swinging. I. Cant. Unsee. This.
Blow job season was short but glorious.
You know you had a good time when you get the wheelchair treatment in Mexico back to your cruise.
Don't shower too much, need the shame to be fresh to get the best story
I may or may not have spent student loan money on a vibrator, that falls under living expenses right?
I'm sorry you had to knock him out on your birthday. But that also means I won the bet that you'd hit someone so you owe me 40. dollars
Randomize
