after you took your Demerol you started flying around and talking like the robot ship on the movie Stealth. then you licked my iPhone and declared the mission a success.
He had the smallest penis i'd ever seen. I can see why he drinks his life away.
We got a Christmas tree, decorated it to surprise his wife And kids who were out of town for her father's funeral, then fucked like rabbits on their new mattress before he had to pick them up at the airport.
so you told her it was a 'nam scar? i mean, how old does she think you are.
Alright I don't know how you'll link it to me but yes I left a nearly empty 12 pack on your trunk
just saw someone in just a bathrobe not even tied shut run to the bathroom with a facefull of cum. Someone had a good night
when seducing a hipster, do you think taking a nude pic on a lomo-camera app would increase my chances? grainy off-colored boobs and telling him how much i like reading salinger?
I'd return your shirt, but it got all wet from lying on the bathroom floor while I was in the shower with Justin's roommate...
Keep it.
in other news, i feel like i just shat out all my sins.
I just smoked a joint and ate a sandwich while watching someone get arrested. Bonnaroo is a silly place.
Free stuff before I even put his balls in my mouth like wow great start
On another note, I almost lost one side of my fake butt. Dancing the wobble with the fake butt isn't recommend.
I'm no doctor but I don't think balls are supposed to look like that.
i out mim tonsoeep
I just woke up with a pair of handcuffs in my pants, can u explain this?
Randomize
