Yeah, where have you been?
Clearly not facebooking enough. Sweet jesus.
he stole me 6 pairs of frilly undies and proclaimed "your ass looks like a 5 in those. it'll be a 10 in these bad boys". every girl needs a gay bff.
im so glad i don't have to work tomorrow. I'm spendin all night on the new call of duty.
Wow. That's the gayest thing you ever said.
Look man i'm staying in playing videogames and growing a beard. Its not like i'm trying to get a girlfriend.
just bought a $25 eighth from a chick who has a kid. i'm helping my community out right?
UD be completely fine. you don't lose control just keep a positive environment. for example i really want to lick the wall cause red is delicious but i don't have to.
I don't care what you say, cheap wine does NOT taste better in expensive crystal...
They told me I stole 50 buns and a bottle of mayo and would whisper in their ears to look under my shirt to see what was for breakfast... benefit of starting to drink at 9 am
almost passed out on the way to class today.. laid down in a construction site. bad idea
The bloodstain in the garden looks like a sad face. Like I don't already know this is bad...
I just celebrated my ex boyfriends birthday by having more sex than he will today.
I just laid my head on this pillow and I smelt your penis. It was comforting.
You missed the winter stoner olympics last night....I got the gold in blunt rolling
Update: the condoms are expired and Canadians are NOT to be trusted!
You can’t homewreck what the Lord hath brought together.
Of course his mom thinks you're nice, she doesn't know you have sex for cheeseburgers
One time!! I like sex and food....
Randomize
