Hard rock hotel, wtf why am i still out, im gonna fuk 5 chix 2nite .maybe
im watching my roommate bang this girl. she doesn't look like she's any good, because he has a bored look on his face...
we can't become the bulimic house in the complex dude. Besides, you need teeth for your career.
no, i'm currently making the trek across campus to get all my stuff from last night. My ID is in one guys bed, and my camera in another guy's bed.
almost got into it with the cashier. bitch dont look at me like that just cuz im only buying wine and icing. ill fight.
It's one of those mornings where you wake up and want to go to church for the first time in ten years. THAT shameful.
Oh I already celebrated valentine's day. I stayed up until 4 AM listening to biggie, drinking rum, and caressing all my girl curves in front of the mirror. And then I came 3 times.
Using all my books as packing buffer for my liquor bottles. And you said being an English major was worthless.
He woke me up, handed me a ringing phone and said break up w her for me. That hung over.
I just noticed that pic of your cock has a Christmas tree in the background. It's July.
I need to get off of her emotional roller coaster. I've been on it for a fucking year and I've been throwing up the entire time.
Amanda, I can 99.9% assure you i'm probably never going to bang your mom
I DON'T LIKE THAT SENTENCE
He woke me up because I was snoring and went for a second round. First time I'm happy that I snore
Just taking a shit and realized the captain planet theme song is stuck in my head.
when some dude came up to you and said he didn't like your shirt you just looked at him and firmly asked if he really thought that you gave a fuck.
Randomize
